The following is an excerpt written by an autism mom named
Kristine Barnett, from her book “The Spark”:
“For the past year and a half, every moment that Jake had
been awake had been about autism: drills
and therapy and pattern recognition to work on his lowest skills. In all of this, we had forgotten something
vitally essential childhood. Typical childhood experiences- like watching
your cold fingers wrinkle up under a sprinkler on the first superhot day of the
year- are important for everyone, not just typical kids. Every family needs to have special traditions
that celebrate who they are and what matters to them. I knew from my own days growing up that such
traditions don’t have to be a big deal to be meaningful.”
As summer officially kicks off in full swing, children
celebrate the end of school year and the beginning of long summer days filled
with play and relaxation. However, for children
with autism, along with other children with disabilities or just struggling
learners, school most likely will not end in the summer. Many children will take part in Extended
School Year summer programs geared towards helping them retain their academic
skills and continue to develop their social skills.
While as an educator, I know the research about the “summer
slide” better than most. In case you
haven’t heard of the term, the summer slide refers to the phenomenon in which
students will lose academic ground over the summer and enter the next school
year even further behind then when they left in May. This is why many schools offer summer
programs and services that are geared towards stopping this summer slide. I believe that these programs have merit, and
I support any parent who chooses to enroll their children. However, I have chosen not to enroll Ben in
these summer programs, and here’s why.
While I believe in high academic standards, I also equally
believe that Ben needs time to be a kid.
The fact that he has autism does not make this need any less real.
Ben deserves time to play on the beach, run through the
sprinkler in our front lawn, throw water balloons, and paint at his art table for
hours if he feels like it. He deserves
trips to the movie theater, to the pool with his friends, and outside to catch
the ice cream truck as it slowly drives down our street.
I think it is easy to discount the importance of allowing a
child with special needs unstructured time when the overpowering message is
that every moment of therapy is vitally important. And while it makes logical sense that filling
every moment possible with targeted, systematic, therapeutic work will help to
close the developmental gap, my gut tells me that sometimes we have to slow
down in order to leap forward.
Because I’ve watched my child over the last few months of
school slowly burn out. I don’t remember
counting the days until the weekend when I was in Pre-K. Actually, when I was in school, we didn’t
have Pre-K at all. I went to a half-day
kindergarten, but I digress. During the
school year, Ben’s days are filled with school, after school therapy, and then
extracurricular activities, depending on the season. And, while my son loves being busy, this
break-neck schedule was starting to take its toll. I cannot imagine asking him to sit through another
8 am – 4 pm school day through the summer.
Even adults get time off. He
should too.
And then there’s the expectations that children are expected
to achieve in school. Academic standards
have changed. If you haven’t been in a
classroom in the past few years, then you may not be aware of this shift. The expectations for a student leaving Pre-K
is roughly equal to what we would have expected an incoming first grader to
have mastered a few years ago. Ben will
be entering kindergarten knowing all of his letters and sounds, able to read
several sight words and easy, repetitive books.
His friend Nikki who will be in his kindergarten class (and who also has
autism) can already read books on a second grade level, if not higher. It is not uncommon for children to enter
kindergarten already reading. Ben can
write his name and write a simple story with a beginning, middle, and end
across three pages. He can count to 100,
and up to 10 in Spanish. He can skip
count by 10s. He knows his shapes,
including ellipse, rhombus, and hexagon, and the list goes on. However, if your
incoming kindergartener can’t do these things, don’t panic. The kindergarten year is the great equalizer,
and those wonderful kindergarten teachers are able to catch most children up
during their kindergarten year. However,
we teachers know that children who enter kindergarten with those academic
skills under their belt definitely have an advantage.
However, for Ben, the academics aren’t what makes school
challenging. The hard part for him is to
sustain focus while sitting on the carpet for an extended period of time (think
up to a half hour at some points). He
has had to learn to wait his turn, take turns, share, and participate in large
and small group activities (but only after the teacher calls on him to do so). He has learned independence, which includes
everything from putting on his shoes to opening his containers at lunch. He has had to learn to navigate the big
school building with his classmates, all of whom are 5 years old or
younger. They’ve had to walk down the
hallways in a quiet line, attend school assemblies, sit with the older kids in
the lunchroom, and play appropriately at recess. When I was Ben’s age, I was learning to cut
and color at a small, home-based daycare where I attended a few days a week
with a few other kids my age.
School is hard enough work, with a daily schedule dictated
by grown-ups. This leaves very little
room for choice in Ben’s day. I believe
in the summer Ben deserves to have time to explore his interests and choose
what he would like to do. He deserves to
make memories to sustain him through those days at school when the challenges
rise up and seem insurmountable. He has
earned his break.
Another huge reason that we have a school-free summer is
that we live across the country from our family, and summer is the time when we
visit them. Starting when Ben was a few
months old, every summer he have hopped on an airplane and flown up North to
see family. Along the way, we’ve created
summer traditions that Ben remembers and anticipates long before the big
trip. Things like fishing at my aunt’s
pond. Things like going camping in a log
cabin and making a fire with Papa to roast marshmallows. Things like decorating a golf cart and riding
around the campgrounds while Papa lets him take the wheel when I’m not looking. Things like going to the park with his Papaw
and walking on the old train tracks looking for forgotten treasures. Or having a sleepover at Granny’s house and
making homemade waffles the next morning and pouring syrup on them with those
tiny bottles from Cracker Barrel.
These are the family traditions that weave a rich tapestry
of memories that Ben calls up time and again during the year. Through these simple but powerful moments, he
forms a bond with his family members that last him through the long months when
he only communicates with them through phone calls and Face Time. No extra learning time in summer school is
worth sacrificing these moments.
I believe that these special summer moments only strengthen
his experience in school, because they provide him with a strong background
knowledge that many students are missing.
For example, if he reads a story
in class about camping, he can picture what camping looks like in his mind,
because he camped with his family during the summer. Experiences are our most powerful teacher,
and in the summer, the real world is Ben’s classroom.
But lest you think we’re not working on any school-related skills
at all, let me reassure you that our summer will still be filled with
therapy. Right now, I’m sitting at
Starbucks typing this blog, while Ben is attending a camp offered through his
private Occupational Therapy sensory gym. Throughout the month of June, Ben
will be participating in a social skills group, a fine motor group, and a “Get
Ready for Kindergarten” group. Then
we’re off to visit family and friends, where he will have the chance to
practice his social skills with all those relatives and friends at birthday
parties and get-togethers. He sharpens
those fine motor skills on a daily basis as he paints and mixes colors, makes
bead projects, and designs sticker-studded masterpieces. I’ve also amassed a huge collection of
beginning reading books, and Ben is very proud that he is slowly learning to
read them to me as we practice every day.
I have every confidence that his academic skills won’t slip this summer
but will continue to strengthen through this authentic practice.
We have all heard the saying that a child’s play is their
first work, but I think it’s easy for special needs parents to dismiss the
power of unstructured play and exploration because we feel the pressure of the
clock that is ticking, pushing our son or daughter further and further behind
their peers. And that makes us easy
targets for any person or program to prey on us, promising a quick cure if only
we will invest our time in their product.
I know that therapy has its place, and the amount and type of therapy is
a very personal decision for each family, but, for me, I’m going to make sure
to make play and family time a big priority in the summer. And even if you are a parent whose child is
attending extended year classes every day this summer, I encourage you to carve
out those times this summer to make special memories with your child. Start summer traditions, even if it’s as
simple as setting up the sprinkler in the yard or having a water balloon
war. Your child will thank you for
it. I wish you a summer of fun and
enjoyment with your family, with memories to last a lifetime!
Amen.
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